


Don't Leave Me

by bucky77



Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Friendship, Hurt/Comfort, Nightmares
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-16
Updated: 2019-12-16
Packaged: 2021-02-26 06:09:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,792
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21818686
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bucky77/pseuds/bucky77
Summary: Rose comforts the Doctor when he needs her.
Relationships: The Doctor (Doctor Who)/Rose Tyler
Comments: 2
Kudos: 31





	Don't Leave Me

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt: "Don't leave me"

The Doctor woke suddenly in a cold sweat. He felt disoriented for a few seconds in the dark before the TARDIS slowly raised the lights. He was in the library, asleep on the couch. He shut his eyes, trying to steady his heartbeats and slow his breathing. Just a nightmare. Just a nightmare.

Suddenly, he heard footsteps thundering down the hall towards him.

"Doctor!" he heard Rose yell, fear clear in her voice. He bolted upright and ran towards the door, crashing into her as she rounded the corner. He grabbed her shoulders, steadying them both, and looked into her eyes.

"What's wrong?" he asked her hurriedly. The fear he saw in her eyes quickly faded to confusion.

"Are you okay?" she asked him.

"Of course I'm okay, I'm always okay..." he hugged her tight, deciding there was no immediate danger. It was his turn to be confused now. What had happened? What had scared her so much? Before he had the chance to ask her, she mumbled the answer into his chest.

"You were screaming..." the Doctor felt his entire body tense with a mixture of the memory of his nightmare and the embarrassment of seeming weak in front of Rose. He kept holding her close, trying to hide his face as his mind raced over the million possibilities of things he could say. No he wasn't? No, she'd never believe that. That it was a nightmare? No, then he'd look pathetic. That he stubbed his toe?

Before he could come up with some excuse, he felt Rose pull away from him. Her eyes met his, concerned, and the Doctor could do nothing but stare back at her in shock. He never, never, showed weakness in front of Rose. Never. Her face softened with the one expression he never wanted to see directed at him. Pity. The only thing he could think to do was shut himself down, pretend this wasn't happening. This couldn't be happening.

He took a few steps back from Rose. He felt like his eyes were literally boring holes in his hearts and he couldn't handle it.

"You ok?" she asked him, clearly trying to make her tone lighter than she felt. He could tell she was trying not to corner him, not to make him uncomfortable, but it wasn't working. He wanted to say something, anything, to stop her worrying, but his throat betrayed him, tightening up and stopping him talking. He just nodded slightly, making sure the blank expression stayed firmly in place.

"You wanna talk about it?" she asked in the same light tone.

"No," he answered her, his voice coming out as a whisper.

"Okay," she nodded. The Doctor's chest tightened at the thought of her leaving him alone in the library. That's ridiculous, you're the Doctor! The Oncoming Storm! You can't be afraid of your own goddamn library. The feeling didn't last for long, however, as she began to make her way further into the room, passing him on the way to the couch. She was halfway there when she looked over her shoulder and saw the Doctor still plastered to the same spot. She walked back to him and grabbed his hand, dragging him with her.

They sat down on the couch, with Rose positioning herself far enough away from him so he didn't feel crowded, but close enough that he didn't feel alone. She knew his boundaries back to front. The Doctor felt tense and unbelievably awkward. He wasn't looking at Rose but he could feel her eyes on him. His mind was still racing. He knew the best way to get out of this was to talk. Pick a topic and rattle on about it for a while, his cheerful self. But he couldn't think. There was nothing in his mind but the feeling of Rose's eyes on him and the residual flashes from his nightmare. Gallifrey was burning.

He shut his eyes and tried to force the images from his head, but all he could see behind his closed eyes was fire. He felt panic rise in his chest, and his breathing sped up before he could stop it as his memories began to resurface. Suddenly, he felt a hand on his shoulder, making him jump.

"Just me," Rose said, scooting even closer and grabbing one of his hands in hers. The Doctor kept his gaze fixed on their entwined fingers. He dared not shut his eyes again. They sat for a while, shoulders pressed together and holding each others hands, until Rose broke the silence.

"You know I'm here for you if you need me, right?" At her words, the Doctor looked up at her. He looked over her face carefully, knowing she truly meant what she said. Or at least she thought she did. 

"Yeah, yeah of course." he answered in the brightest tone he could manage. The pair looked into each others eyes for a moment, as though testing each other's limits. They were both trying to decide what the best course of action to take from here would be. This was untested territory for the both of them. He had always been the strong one - undefeated and unbreakable. Rose wanted to listen, to understand, to help, but she didn't know how. The Doctor wanted to stay composed. He didn't want her to have to hold him up. It was too much weight. But he wanted nothing more than to be honest with her. He looked down and steeled himself for what he was going to say next. It terrified him.

"It was just a nightmare." He told her, half to open up, and half to reassure himself.

"What about?" she asked softly. He took a moment to decide how to answer.

"Gallifrey."

"What's Gallifrey?"

"Home. It was. It was home." Rose seemed a little put off by this.

"You have nightmares about home?" she asked him curiously, if a little sadly. He took a deep breath. How could he possibly explain?

"There was a war. The whole planet..." he trailed off, staring at the door as though he could run out of it, away from the memories, away from the fire. He felt his legs twitch and took a deep breath to calm down. His hands involuntarily tightened around Rose's, as though she could tether him to the spot. It was probably uncomfortable, but she wasn't complaining.

"I'm sorry." Rose told him, and he nodded at the ground. "You were there," she said, not asking him, just letting him know that she knew.

"Yeah." Just then, something clicked in his mind, making him look quizzically up at Rose. She seemed to realise his odd expression almost as soon as it crossed his face, and cocked an eyebrow inquisitively at him.

"I've never told anyone that before..." he trailed off. And he hadn't. Ever since the war, there was no one he had even mentioned his home planet to. How had she done that? How had she made him so comfortable around her that he would tell her? In such a short amount of time?

"Well, call me crazy," she joked, "but sometimes talking about things makes them easier." She gave him a cheeky grin, and he even dared to crack a smile himself. The tension in her shoulders that he hadn't even realised was there relaxed a bit.

"Sorry," he said sheepishly.

"What for?"

"Waking you." 

"Wasn't asleep, but never say sorry if you need me, ok?" she told him, sounding the most serious she had since their conversation began. "Like I said, I'm here if you need me. That's not conditional."

"Yeah." They sat quietly for another moment, simply glad for the peace that had settled in the room. The lights had dimmed slightly again, as though the TARDIS had realised the Doctor didn't need to be afraid of the dark with Rose there.

"You should get some more rest, big day tomorrow!" she said, mimicking him. Because we skip the little ones. She made a move to stand up and the Doctor felt a wave of panic take over him.

"Don't leave me," he blurted out before he could stop himself. Immediately, he shut his eyes in embarrassment and clenched his fists in anger at himself. How could you be so stupid? It's one thing having a nightmare and needing to be comforted like a damn kid, it's another to be so scared you don't even want to be alone in your TARDIS.

"Okay," she said without hesitation, sitting back down next to him before he could even open his eyes again.

"No, no sorry. I'll be fine," he backtracked, trying to regain any dignity he possibly could from this situation.

"No, I'll stay," she responded without a second thought. He believed her, and knew she had no problem with it, but he couldn't expect her to be there every time this happened. He couldn't let himself lean on her, for her sake more than his.

"Really, it's okay, you can go," he tried one last time before Rose abruptly ended the conversation.

"I know I can go, but I'm not going to." The Doctor looked up at her, and examined her face for what felt like the millionth time tonight. What did I do to deserve you? Why are you so good to me? He felt his hearts swell in his chest at his companion's unending empathy, and had to peel his eyes away from hers before the understanding in them became too much for his current emotional state, which was apparently more fragile than he had thought, to handle.

"Come here," she scooted back on the couch to lie down, opening her arms to him. He hesitated before making up his mind and deciding that he could let himself depend on her for one night, just one, and lying next to her. She wrapped her arms around him, and as stupid as he felt for all his weakness, he truly felt safe. 

He felt himself relax, and shut his eyes, but behind his lids was the city burning, and the children running for their lives. He forced his eyes open again and took a few more deep breaths. He could not, he would not, be more pathetic tonight than he already had been. No chance. But he didn't need to say anything more as Rose hugged him tighter, noticing he was forcing himself awake. 

"You're safe. Just me and you in the TARDIS," she reassured him, and for once in his life he believed it. He was safe in the TARDIS and Rose was there. She always would be whenever he needed her. And the knowledge of that fact was enough to let him slip away into a peaceful sleep.

**Author's Note:**

> Comments and constructive criticism are always appreciated! I don't own these characters.


End file.
